Atlanta, Georgia Personal Injury Lawyer
Atlanta personal injury lawyer blog
Friday, February 19, 2010
Georgia Teacher On Trial for Classroom Striptease
Friday, January 8, 2010
Parents in Student/Teacher Relationship Case Tell a Different Story
Wednesday, January 6, 2010
Fatal Auto Accidents Involving Teen Drivers in Georgia
Wednesday, December 23, 2009
New Findings on the Prevalence of Teen “Sexting”
Wednesday, December 16, 2009
Can Students Consent to Sex with a Teacher?
Tuesday, December 15, 2009
Harassment Leads to Suicide in ‘Sexting’ Scandal
Friday, October 16, 2009
Suspect Your Child is Experiencing Teen Dating Violence? Take Action NOW
Thursday, October 15, 2009
10 Warning Signs of Teen Dating Violence
Wednesday, October 14, 2009
Atlanta Program Aims to Stop Teen Dating Violence
Tuesday, October 13, 2009
How to Talk to Your Teen About Sexting
Monday, October 12, 2009
Lilburn Man Arrested for “Sexting” 14-Year-Old-Girl
Tuesday, September 29, 2009
Safety Advice for Parents of Teenage Drivers
Monday, July 27, 2009
How to Prevent One of the Most Common Teen Driving Mistakes
Tuesday, June 16, 2009
Should New Drivers Be Required to Sport Identifying Car Magnet?
Monday, June 8, 2009
Digital Music Players can be a Dangerous Distraction
Having turned down a plea deal, former Southwest DeKalb High School chorus teacher Nathan Grigsby will be going to trial for allowing several of his male students to engage in a "Chippendales style" performance in his classroom during class time.
In 2008, Grigsby allegedly allowed three male students to strip out of their clothing and dance in a sexually explicit style. They gave lap dances, manhandled female students, and performed simulated sex acts on them. According to Solicitor-General Robert James, Grigsby provided the music himself - “Meeting in My Bedroom” by Silk.
“There were lewd caresses and gropes all in the presence of a teacher,” James said. “Under the law, if you have custody and control of kids, you are held to a higher standard. You don’t get to just turn your head.”
Grigsby was terminated from his teaching position when video of the performance surfaced on Facebook. He is being charged with six counts of indecency, and four counts of contributing to the deprivation of a minor. His trial is slated to begin in March. A judge recently granted him the extra time to prepare his case after having dismissed his original attorney. The two of them had apparently had a disagreement over his plea.
Grigsby's new attorney, Jackie Patterson, seems optimistic.
“I’m excited about trying this case and presenting witnesses to show he had no knowledge of what took place,” Patterson said.
The students involved have come to their former teacher's defense, according to Patterson. They wanted him to keep his job, and have continued to be supportive as this case turns toward a future trial. Patterson has said that they are willing to testify on Grigsby's behalf, supporting the claim that he did not know the nature of their performance and should not be held responsible for their actions.
“It is no question that Mr. Grigsby had no knowledge that these kids would commit these sex acts and put them on video. When the kids started performing these acts, it took him totally off guard,” Patterson said. “You can’t hold a teacher accountable for everything a child does.”
While it is true that a teacher may not be able to predict everything that will happen in his class, it is his job to control and oversee the behavior of his students. There is no question that what took place in his classroom was inappropriate, and potentially offensive or even hurtful to students in the class who could have been less enthusiastic for the display. It is also, quite simply, inappropriate behavior for school, and for teenagers in the company of an adult. As a teacher, it was expected that Grigsby control his class and look out for the wellbeing of his students. It was also expected that he would provide discipline in the event where that control is lost. Perhaps he honestly was simply taken so entirely by surprise that he failed to respond in a timely manner, and perhaps he felt that he did regain control of the situation adequately, but this story is without a doubt troubling.
None of the students were charged in this case.
In 2008, Grigsby allegedly allowed three male students to strip out of their clothing and dance in a sexually explicit style. They gave lap dances, manhandled female students, and performed simulated sex acts on them. According to Solicitor-General Robert James, Grigsby provided the music himself - “Meeting in My Bedroom” by Silk.
“There were lewd caresses and gropes all in the presence of a teacher,” James said. “Under the law, if you have custody and control of kids, you are held to a higher standard. You don’t get to just turn your head.”
Grigsby was terminated from his teaching position when video of the performance surfaced on Facebook. He is being charged with six counts of indecency, and four counts of contributing to the deprivation of a minor. His trial is slated to begin in March. A judge recently granted him the extra time to prepare his case after having dismissed his original attorney. The two of them had apparently had a disagreement over his plea.
Grigsby's new attorney, Jackie Patterson, seems optimistic.
“I’m excited about trying this case and presenting witnesses to show he had no knowledge of what took place,” Patterson said.
The students involved have come to their former teacher's defense, according to Patterson. They wanted him to keep his job, and have continued to be supportive as this case turns toward a future trial. Patterson has said that they are willing to testify on Grigsby's behalf, supporting the claim that he did not know the nature of their performance and should not be held responsible for their actions.
“It is no question that Mr. Grigsby had no knowledge that these kids would commit these sex acts and put them on video. When the kids started performing these acts, it took him totally off guard,” Patterson said. “You can’t hold a teacher accountable for everything a child does.”
While it is true that a teacher may not be able to predict everything that will happen in his class, it is his job to control and oversee the behavior of his students. There is no question that what took place in his classroom was inappropriate, and potentially offensive or even hurtful to students in the class who could have been less enthusiastic for the display. It is also, quite simply, inappropriate behavior for school, and for teenagers in the company of an adult. As a teacher, it was expected that Grigsby control his class and look out for the wellbeing of his students. It was also expected that he would provide discipline in the event where that control is lost. Perhaps he honestly was simply taken so entirely by surprise that he failed to respond in a timely manner, and perhaps he felt that he did regain control of the situation adequately, but this story is without a doubt troubling.
None of the students were charged in this case.
Labels: atlanta, child safety, child sexual abuse, child sexual exploitation, Dekalb County, Georgia, teen safety, teenagers
As the case of Steven Parkman, the teacher who allegedly had consensual sex with his seventeen year old student, the victim’s parents offer a much different view of their daughter’s relationship than the defense has tried to show.
Parkman, the thirty-four year old orchestra teacher from Harrison High School in Kennesaw who left his job rather than be terminated when the school discovered the nature of his relationship with his student, is not a stranger to this blog. He is one of the main actors in a controversial case which I have talked about before. Originally indicted in 2008, additional charges were added last month; Parkman will most likely face trial this year for five counts of sexual assault against a person in custody and four counts of sodomy as a result of allegedly having a sexual relationship with one of his female students.
Parkman’s attorney, Noah Pines, has argued that the case against his client should be dropped on the grounds that the seventeen year old student was both willing and able to consent under Georgia state law. Current Georgia law does not forbid sex between a teacher and a student, provided that student is over sixteen – the state’s legal age of consent.
Pines said "the evidence is clear that this was a consensual relationship."
And in response to the new voices coming to the discussion, those of the alleged victim’s family, he added, "I understand that her parents may not want to admit that fact.”
The victim’s parents have used another word to describe their daughter’s relationship with her former teacher: “groomed.”
According to the girl’s parents, Parkman began grooming their daughter for a relationship with him beginning in her freshman year of high school.
"He used her and really kind of forced her into the relationship," the father said. "It was not consensual at all."
The girl’s parents described situations where Parkman would arrange to sit next to their daughter on flights they took together as part of out of town orchestra competitions. They say that he would arrange for their hotel rooms to be close together when they stayed over night. More shockingly, they speak of threats and coercion.
The parents claim that after the sexual relationship began, Parkman threatened the girl will poorer grades and college recommendations if she tried to break it off.
"He was telling her if she didn't come over to the house and be with him, he would make her sorry for it and make sure she wouldn’t get into any college or university," her father said.
And he later explained, "[Parkman] held her hostage to the point where she couldn’t handle it anymore, until she blew the whistle on the whole thing.”
By which he means that eventually, after a two and a half month sexual relationship with her teacher, the girl did come forward to her parents. Her parents then contacted both the school and the police.
The relationship began in winter of 2008 and lasted until April, when Parkman was arrested.
Parkman, the thirty-four year old orchestra teacher from Harrison High School in Kennesaw who left his job rather than be terminated when the school discovered the nature of his relationship with his student, is not a stranger to this blog. He is one of the main actors in a controversial case which I have talked about before. Originally indicted in 2008, additional charges were added last month; Parkman will most likely face trial this year for five counts of sexual assault against a person in custody and four counts of sodomy as a result of allegedly having a sexual relationship with one of his female students.Parkman’s attorney, Noah Pines, has argued that the case against his client should be dropped on the grounds that the seventeen year old student was both willing and able to consent under Georgia state law. Current Georgia law does not forbid sex between a teacher and a student, provided that student is over sixteen – the state’s legal age of consent.
Pines said "the evidence is clear that this was a consensual relationship."
And in response to the new voices coming to the discussion, those of the alleged victim’s family, he added, "I understand that her parents may not want to admit that fact.”
The victim’s parents have used another word to describe their daughter’s relationship with her former teacher: “groomed.”
According to the girl’s parents, Parkman began grooming their daughter for a relationship with him beginning in her freshman year of high school.
"He used her and really kind of forced her into the relationship," the father said. "It was not consensual at all."
The girl’s parents described situations where Parkman would arrange to sit next to their daughter on flights they took together as part of out of town orchestra competitions. They say that he would arrange for their hotel rooms to be close together when they stayed over night. More shockingly, they speak of threats and coercion.
The parents claim that after the sexual relationship began, Parkman threatened the girl will poorer grades and college recommendations if she tried to break it off.
"He was telling her if she didn't come over to the house and be with him, he would make her sorry for it and make sure she wouldn’t get into any college or university," her father said.
And he later explained, "[Parkman] held her hostage to the point where she couldn’t handle it anymore, until she blew the whistle on the whole thing.”
By which he means that eventually, after a two and a half month sexual relationship with her teacher, the girl did come forward to her parents. Her parents then contacted both the school and the police.
The relationship began in winter of 2008 and lasted until April, when Parkman was arrested.
Labels: child sexual abuse, child sexual exploitation, Georgia, teenagers
As a Georgia personal injury attorney, I have represented many clients injured by young drivers and many clients who have lost loved ones in accidents involving teen drivers. It’s an indisputable fact that inexperienced and often immature young drivers have high rates of involvement in fatal car wrecks.
A November 2009 report from the National Highway Traffic Safety Administration (NHTSA) shows that young drivers ages 15 to 20 represent just 6 percent of licensed drivers but account for 19 percent of fatal crashes. Further, the NHTSA report points out:
Approximately two-thirds of the people killed in fatal young-driver crashes are the young drivers themselves or the passengers (of all ages) of the young drivers.
Of the passengers killed riding in vehicles with young drivers, 67 percent are in the same 15-to-20-year-old age group as the drivers.
Fifty-six percent of the fatal crashes and 57 percent of the fatalities involving young drivers occur on rural roadways.
The majority of passengers killed in teen driver accidents are other teens. Because of this fact, most states now have graduated driver’s licensing (GDL) programs for teens. Typically, the first stage of a GDL includes the learner’s permit, which allows the teen to drive only with another fully licensed adult in the vehicle. Stage two is the intermediate or provisional stage with various restrictions such as nighttime driving limits, driving curfews, and passenger restrictions (including restrictions on other teens passengers). Stage three is the full driver’s license.
Currently, 48 states plus the District of Columbia have nighttime restrictions in place for the provisional stage, and 42 states plus D.C. have passenger restrictions. The restrictions are typically lifted at age 18.
In Georgia, Joshua’s Law was passed in 2007. Along with the Teenage and Adult Driver and Responsibility Act (TADRA), Joshua’s law changed the process of licensing for teen drivers in Georgia and established a GDL system. In Georgia, a teen my apply for a learner’s permit at age 15. A teen with a learner’s permit must be accompanied by an adult age 21 or older with a class C license in order to drive. The intermediate drivers license in Georgia may be applied for at age 16 after a teen completes a driver education program. Teens with a class D intermediate license cannot drive between midnight and 6:00 a.m., and during the first six months they cannot have any passengers outside of immediate family. After six months, teens may carry one non-family passenger under the age of 21. After one year, teens drivers in Georgia may have up to three non-family passengers under 21. These restrictions have likely saved countless lives.
However, teen crash fatalities in Georgia area still high. In 2007, there were 300 fatalities involving young drivers in Georgia. Of these fatalities, 120 were teen drivers themselves.
If you have teen drivers in your family, be sure to talk to them about motor vehicle crashes. Talk to them about the dangers of speeding, drunk driving, and distracted driving; these risk factors cause the majority of teen wrecks.
If you’ve been seriously injured by a teen driver or any driver in Georgia, contact an experienced Georgia auto accident lawyer as soon as possible. Call MLN Law at 4094-531-9700 to schedule a free consultation.
A November 2009 report from the National Highway Traffic Safety Administration (NHTSA) shows that young drivers ages 15 to 20 represent just 6 percent of licensed drivers but account for 19 percent of fatal crashes. Further, the NHTSA report points out:
Approximately two-thirds of the people killed in fatal young-driver crashes are the young drivers themselves or the passengers (of all ages) of the young drivers.
Of the passengers killed riding in vehicles with young drivers, 67 percent are in the same 15-to-20-year-old age group as the drivers.
Fifty-six percent of the fatal crashes and 57 percent of the fatalities involving young drivers occur on rural roadways.
The majority of passengers killed in teen driver accidents are other teens. Because of this fact, most states now have graduated driver’s licensing (GDL) programs for teens. Typically, the first stage of a GDL includes the learner’s permit, which allows the teen to drive only with another fully licensed adult in the vehicle. Stage two is the intermediate or provisional stage with various restrictions such as nighttime driving limits, driving curfews, and passenger restrictions (including restrictions on other teens passengers). Stage three is the full driver’s license.
Currently, 48 states plus the District of Columbia have nighttime restrictions in place for the provisional stage, and 42 states plus D.C. have passenger restrictions. The restrictions are typically lifted at age 18.
In Georgia, Joshua’s Law was passed in 2007. Along with the Teenage and Adult Driver and Responsibility Act (TADRA), Joshua’s law changed the process of licensing for teen drivers in Georgia and established a GDL system. In Georgia, a teen my apply for a learner’s permit at age 15. A teen with a learner’s permit must be accompanied by an adult age 21 or older with a class C license in order to drive. The intermediate drivers license in Georgia may be applied for at age 16 after a teen completes a driver education program. Teens with a class D intermediate license cannot drive between midnight and 6:00 a.m., and during the first six months they cannot have any passengers outside of immediate family. After six months, teens may carry one non-family passenger under the age of 21. After one year, teens drivers in Georgia may have up to three non-family passengers under 21. These restrictions have likely saved countless lives.
However, teen crash fatalities in Georgia area still high. In 2007, there were 300 fatalities involving young drivers in Georgia. Of these fatalities, 120 were teen drivers themselves.
If you have teen drivers in your family, be sure to talk to them about motor vehicle crashes. Talk to them about the dangers of speeding, drunk driving, and distracted driving; these risk factors cause the majority of teen wrecks.
If you’ve been seriously injured by a teen driver or any driver in Georgia, contact an experienced Georgia auto accident lawyer as soon as possible. Call MLN Law at 4094-531-9700 to schedule a free consultation.
Labels: auto accident, teen drivers, teenagers, wrongful death
According to a new study by the Pew Research Center's Internet and American Life Project, 15 percent of teens who have a cell phone have received messages or images of a sexually explicit nature, a practice that has recently become known as sexting.
The study’s data comes from phone surveys, questionnaires and interviews with 800 American teens between the ages of twelve and seventeen, 625 of whom had cell phones of their own.
The study was able to apply statistics to a situation which has worried lawmakers and parents since anecdotal evidence for it first hit the mainstream news. Law enforcement officials have since been stepping in more and more as they attempt to take control of the increasingly unruly sexting situation.
On the one hand, their actions have seemed somewhat disproportionate and unfair when it leads to teens being prosecuted as sex offenders, a lifetime label, for possessing nude or nearly nude photos of their own girlfriends or ex-girlfriends, or in some cases of themselves.
The stories include those like Phillip Albert, an eighteen year old boy who forwarded a naked picture of his sixteen year old girlfriend in a fit of rage after the couple had a fight. Albert was found guilty of sending out child pornography, and registered as a sex offender.
On the other hand, stories like that of Hope Witsell, a teen girl who committed suicide after a nude picture of her was shared with classmates, drive home the serious consequences that can result from authority figures failing to step in or from responding inappropriately to sexting situations.
Some states have already begun changing their laws to take into account the fact that the real problem here is not child pornography, but the generations old fight to get teenagers to think before acting in ways they might later regret.
The Pew Research results found that 4 percent of teens who own cell phones had actually sent photos of themselves to someone else. The likelihood grew along with those involved, with seventeen year olds being twice as likely as the overall average to have sent images.
15 percent of teens who owned cell phones reported receiving sexts. By the age of seventeen, that percentage was as high as 30 percent.
The study found that teens who pay for their own phone were more likely to send sexts. Teens who paid for all of the costs associated with their phones sent the controversial messages at the rate of 17 percent, as opposed to those who paid none or only part of their bill who reported only 3 percent.
Dealing with focus groups highlighted three separate scenarios for sexting. The first scenario is the exchanging of images between romantic partners. The second involved partners exchanging images, then one or the other sharing them with individuals outside of the relationship. The third and last scenario, and perhaps the most dangerous, involved a situation where the two individuals involved in the exchange are not in a relationship, but at least one of them hopes to be.
All of these possible scenarios show the need to teach young people the importance of considering their actions carefully, and being aware that things they do now may hurt themselves or others in the future. Click here for more on this controversial topic.
The study’s data comes from phone surveys, questionnaires and interviews with 800 American teens between the ages of twelve and seventeen, 625 of whom had cell phones of their own.
The study was able to apply statistics to a situation which has worried lawmakers and parents since anecdotal evidence for it first hit the mainstream news. Law enforcement officials have since been stepping in more and more as they attempt to take control of the increasingly unruly sexting situation.
On the one hand, their actions have seemed somewhat disproportionate and unfair when it leads to teens being prosecuted as sex offenders, a lifetime label, for possessing nude or nearly nude photos of their own girlfriends or ex-girlfriends, or in some cases of themselves.
The stories include those like Phillip Albert, an eighteen year old boy who forwarded a naked picture of his sixteen year old girlfriend in a fit of rage after the couple had a fight. Albert was found guilty of sending out child pornography, and registered as a sex offender.On the other hand, stories like that of Hope Witsell, a teen girl who committed suicide after a nude picture of her was shared with classmates, drive home the serious consequences that can result from authority figures failing to step in or from responding inappropriately to sexting situations.
Some states have already begun changing their laws to take into account the fact that the real problem here is not child pornography, but the generations old fight to get teenagers to think before acting in ways they might later regret.
The Pew Research results found that 4 percent of teens who own cell phones had actually sent photos of themselves to someone else. The likelihood grew along with those involved, with seventeen year olds being twice as likely as the overall average to have sent images.
15 percent of teens who owned cell phones reported receiving sexts. By the age of seventeen, that percentage was as high as 30 percent.
The study found that teens who pay for their own phone were more likely to send sexts. Teens who paid for all of the costs associated with their phones sent the controversial messages at the rate of 17 percent, as opposed to those who paid none or only part of their bill who reported only 3 percent.
Dealing with focus groups highlighted three separate scenarios for sexting. The first scenario is the exchanging of images between romantic partners. The second involved partners exchanging images, then one or the other sharing them with individuals outside of the relationship. The third and last scenario, and perhaps the most dangerous, involved a situation where the two individuals involved in the exchange are not in a relationship, but at least one of them hopes to be.
All of these possible scenarios show the need to teach young people the importance of considering their actions carefully, and being aware that things they do now may hurt themselves or others in the future. Click here for more on this controversial topic.
Labels: child sexual exploitation, sexting, teenagers, teens and technology
Last June, the Georgia Supreme Court ruled that in cases where the teenager was over sixteen years of age, consent could be used as a defense in cases of sex between teachers and students. This is based on the fact that, in Georgia, the legal age of consent is sixteen.
From this perspective, if the student is a willing participant in the act, the sex between teachers and their students could be viewed as irresponsible or objectionable, but not technically illegal.
At least one state lawmaker has this issue in his sights for the coming year.
State Rep. Doug Collins (R-Gainesville) plans to attempt to clarify the language of the law where it protects to sexual assault in cases where one party has custody of the other. This law applies to someone, such as a teacher, who has power over the victim. The theory behind this sort of law is that when one person is in a position of power over another, consent becomes difficult to determine. A victim may consent out of fear of retribution if they do not, or out of an eagerness to please someone who they respect. By this theory, this sort of relationship is by nature exploitive.
Collins would remove the consent defense from teachers who sleep with their students when those students are in primary or secondary school.
"It's not OK for a teacher or administrator who has control over a student to have sex with that student, even if that student consents or falls in love with him, as was the case in Cobb," Collins said regarding this issue. "I bet 99 percent of Georgians – especially parents – would say it's not OK."
Any changes to the law will come too late to make a difference in at least two cases, though.
Both teacher Christopher King, thirty-six, and teacher Steven Martin Parkman, thirty-three, were arrested for having sex with their seventeen year old female students. In both cases, the alleged victims claim to have consented to the sex. Both girls involved in these cases were legally above the age of consent by state law, but the nature of the teacher student relationship in these cases cast that consent into question.
"I absolutely knew I had the choice, I could engage in a relationship or not," King’s alleged victim said during his bond hearing. "I chose to wholeheartedly pursue it."
Noah Pine, the defending lawyer in Parkman’s case, would seem to agree with her position.
"If you ask me, the case was presented to the grand jury under a theory that a student – no matter how old she is - doesn't have the ability to consent," Pines said. "That's not what the law is. It is just what the prosecutor interpreted it to be."
But at what point does a student have the ability to consent to sex with a teacher?
Thankfully, while the law may be ambiguous on this issue, school policies are not. Both teachers resigned from their jobs rather than face termination, and both have lost their teaching certification.
From this perspective, if the student is a willing participant in the act, the sex between teachers and their students could be viewed as irresponsible or objectionable, but not technically illegal.
At least one state lawmaker has this issue in his sights for the coming year.
State Rep. Doug Collins (R-Gainesville) plans to attempt to clarify the language of the law where it protects to sexual assault in cases where one party has custody of the other. This law applies to someone, such as a teacher, who has power over the victim. The theory behind this sort of law is that when one person is in a position of power over another, consent becomes difficult to determine. A victim may consent out of fear of retribution if they do not, or out of an eagerness to please someone who they respect. By this theory, this sort of relationship is by nature exploitive.
Collins would remove the consent defense from teachers who sleep with their students when those students are in primary or secondary school.
"It's not OK for a teacher or administrator who has control over a student to have sex with that student, even if that student consents or falls in love with him, as was the case in Cobb," Collins said regarding this issue. "I bet 99 percent of Georgians – especially parents – would say it's not OK."
Any changes to the law will come too late to make a difference in at least two cases, though.
Both teacher Christopher King, thirty-six, and teacher Steven Martin Parkman, thirty-three, were arrested for having sex with their seventeen year old female students. In both cases, the alleged victims claim to have consented to the sex. Both girls involved in these cases were legally above the age of consent by state law, but the nature of the teacher student relationship in these cases cast that consent into question.
"I absolutely knew I had the choice, I could engage in a relationship or not," King’s alleged victim said during his bond hearing. "I chose to wholeheartedly pursue it."
Noah Pine, the defending lawyer in Parkman’s case, would seem to agree with her position.
"If you ask me, the case was presented to the grand jury under a theory that a student – no matter how old she is - doesn't have the ability to consent," Pines said. "That's not what the law is. It is just what the prosecutor interpreted it to be."
But at what point does a student have the ability to consent to sex with a teacher?
Thankfully, while the law may be ambiguous on this issue, school policies are not. Both teachers resigned from their jobs rather than face termination, and both have lost their teaching certification.
Labels: child sexual exploitation, sex offenders, teenagers
What started with a girl sending a boy she liked a picture of her breasts on her cell phone – a practice widely identified as ‘sexting’ in the media – ended with bullying, the misapplication of punishment and eventually the tragic suicide of a thirteen-year-old child.
The Tampa Bay St. Petersburg Times reported on the story and painted a grim picture of a girl under attack from her peers.
The story goes that after sending a picture to a boy, another girl found the picture and forwarded it to others. From there, it circulated through the school. The picture she had taken, and thought – perhaps naively – would not go beyond one person who she wanted to see it was then seen by many, many others, and without her consent.
For this, the student body saw fit to punish this young woman informally, largely through the use of threatening bullying and gender based slurs. But not only that, she was also punished officially by the school.
The school continued what seems to me to be a mishandling of the girl’s situation when she returned.
This has been reported as the second sexting related suicide, but it seems to me that this would be more accurately called one of countless suicides related to bullying. The justification for that bullying may be different, but there is no doubt that this girl was mercilessly harassed, that she was taken advantage of without her consent, and that before her death, authority figures who should have come to her aid only questioned her conduct without protecting her from the grossly inappropriate responses of others.
It is nothing less than heartbreaking that this girl felt that suicide was the only way she could escape an incredible and disproportionate punishment for her inexperience. If you have children or young loved ones, talk to them about sexting. In this space I previously posted some other horrifying stories about the consequences of sexting and a guide on how to talk to your teens about sexting. This conversation may be difficult, but an open and honest conversation about this increasingly prevalent practice now is far preferable to the possible alternatives.
The Tampa Bay St. Petersburg Times reported on the story and painted a grim picture of a girl under attack from her peers.
At the end of the school year at Beth Shields Middle School, the taunting became so bad that Hope Witsell's friends surrounded her between classes. They escorted her down hallways like human shields, fending off insults such as "whore" and "slut." A few days before, Hope had forwarded a nude photo of herself to a boy she liked — a practice widely known as "sexting." The image found its way to other students, who forwarded it to their friends. Soon the nude photo was circulating through cell phones at Shields Middle and Lennard High School, according to multiple students at both schools. "Tons of people talk about me behind my back and I hate it because they call me a whore!" Hope wrote in her journal. "And I can't be a whore I’m too inexperienced. So secretly TONS of people hate me… "
The story goes that after sending a picture to a boy, another girl found the picture and forwarded it to others. From there, it circulated through the school. The picture she had taken, and thought – perhaps naively – would not go beyond one person who she wanted to see it was then seen by many, many others, and without her consent.
For this, the student body saw fit to punish this young woman informally, largely through the use of threatening bullying and gender based slurs. But not only that, she was also punished officially by the school.
School authorities learned of the nude photo around the end of the school year and suspended Hope for the first week of eighth grade, which started in August.
The school continued what seems to me to be a mishandling of the girl’s situation when she returned.
About two weeks after she returned to school, a counselor observed cuts on Hope's legs and had her sign a "no-harm" contract, in which Hope agreed to tell an adult if she felt inclined to hurt herself, her family says. The next day, Hope hanged herself in her bedroom. She was 13.
This has been reported as the second sexting related suicide, but it seems to me that this would be more accurately called one of countless suicides related to bullying. The justification for that bullying may be different, but there is no doubt that this girl was mercilessly harassed, that she was taken advantage of without her consent, and that before her death, authority figures who should have come to her aid only questioned her conduct without protecting her from the grossly inappropriate responses of others.
It is nothing less than heartbreaking that this girl felt that suicide was the only way she could escape an incredible and disproportionate punishment for her inexperience. If you have children or young loved ones, talk to them about sexting. In this space I previously posted some other horrifying stories about the consequences of sexting and a guide on how to talk to your teens about sexting. This conversation may be difficult, but an open and honest conversation about this increasingly prevalent practice now is far preferable to the possible alternatives.
Labels: child sexual exploitation, sexting, teenagers, teens and technology
Over the past two days, I’ve written about the statistics and signs of teen dating violence. If, as a parent, any of these signs seemed too close to home and you suspect that your teen could be experiencing physical, emotional or sexual abuse at the hands of a partner, now is the time to act.
Start a dialogue with your teen. Remind her (the majority of teens suffering from teen dating violence are young women) that nobody deserves to be abused, either physically, emotionally or sexually. Explain to her that she cannot change her abuser. Young girls and abused women often cling to romantic relationships after they have become untenable in the mistaken belief that they or “their love” can change their partner for the better.
Your teen may feel grateful that a responsible adult has stepped in, but it is just as likely that she will rebel against what she sees as parental interference in her relationship. If that’s the case, it may be time to involve a counselor, school administration or a psychologist. Consider having your teen call the National Teen Dating Violence Helpline at 1-866-331-9474 (or 1-866-331-8453 TTY for the hearing impaired,) or visit LoveIsRespect.org to chat live with a counselor who is knowledgeable about teen dating violence. Whatever you do, it is important that you and your teen come up with an exit plan to extricate your child from the abusive relationship before violence escalates. Teens can also call the National Domestic Violence Hotline at 800-799-7233 or contact local domestic violence shelter hotlines, who’s numbers are found in the phone book.
Be extremely careful when the time to end the relationship comes. Do not allow your teen and her abuser to be alone when they break up, and make sure your teen understands that she only has to explain her reasoning once time. Her abuser does not deserve to ask questions or plead for one more chance. As I wrote about in a previous blog post on stalking behaviors, people who feel that they have been wrongly rejected in a relationship, especially if they are already showing violent or abusive tendencies, may escalate to threats or violence after a breakup. Your best bet is to keep your teen separated from her abuser or potential abuser. If this is not possible because they go to the same school, alert the administration to the problem. Make sure your child does not have any classes or lunch period with her ex partner. If your child still feels threatened, enlist a friend or administrator to walk with her between classes. While the majority of teen dating violence takes place at the home of one of the partners, it is better to take precautions than be sorry. Remind your teen that if she feels threatened, she should call 911 immediately.
In a teen dating violence situation, a temporary restraining order (TRO) may be called for. If you take this step, be sure to document all of the abuser’s behavior before the TRO has been taken out. If the abuser violates the TRO, document that too, and call law enforcement immediately. The more evidence you have – notes, text messages, voicemail messages, emails – the easier it will be to prosecute if the case calls for it.
Also, do not underestimate the importance of supporting your teen emotionally after the break up. Chances are your teens abuser was an enormous part of her life while they dated. He or she may have even been your teen’s first boyfriend or girlfriend. The breakup may also affect your teen’s school and social life and her group of friends. Support your teen if she misses this person, but remind her why they broke up. As a parent, you may not be the best person for your teen to talk to about this situation, so consider again enlisting a counselor, teacher or psychologist.
While abusers often share similar characteristics, every teen dating violence relationship is different. Use common sense when intervening, and be sure to ask for the help of experts if there is any question in your mind about how to extricate your child from a bad situation safely.
Also, if you feel that your teen or someone you know is suffering from teen dating violence, feel free to past this post on to them, along with these resources:
LoveIsRespect.org
Alabama Coalition Against Domestic Violence (ACADV)
SafeYouth.Org – Dating Violence
Start a dialogue with your teen. Remind her (the majority of teens suffering from teen dating violence are young women) that nobody deserves to be abused, either physically, emotionally or sexually. Explain to her that she cannot change her abuser. Young girls and abused women often cling to romantic relationships after they have become untenable in the mistaken belief that they or “their love” can change their partner for the better.
Your teen may feel grateful that a responsible adult has stepped in, but it is just as likely that she will rebel against what she sees as parental interference in her relationship. If that’s the case, it may be time to involve a counselor, school administration or a psychologist. Consider having your teen call the National Teen Dating Violence Helpline at 1-866-331-9474 (or 1-866-331-8453 TTY for the hearing impaired,) or visit LoveIsRespect.org to chat live with a counselor who is knowledgeable about teen dating violence. Whatever you do, it is important that you and your teen come up with an exit plan to extricate your child from the abusive relationship before violence escalates. Teens can also call the National Domestic Violence Hotline at 800-799-7233 or contact local domestic violence shelter hotlines, who’s numbers are found in the phone book.
Be extremely careful when the time to end the relationship comes. Do not allow your teen and her abuser to be alone when they break up, and make sure your teen understands that she only has to explain her reasoning once time. Her abuser does not deserve to ask questions or plead for one more chance. As I wrote about in a previous blog post on stalking behaviors, people who feel that they have been wrongly rejected in a relationship, especially if they are already showing violent or abusive tendencies, may escalate to threats or violence after a breakup. Your best bet is to keep your teen separated from her abuser or potential abuser. If this is not possible because they go to the same school, alert the administration to the problem. Make sure your child does not have any classes or lunch period with her ex partner. If your child still feels threatened, enlist a friend or administrator to walk with her between classes. While the majority of teen dating violence takes place at the home of one of the partners, it is better to take precautions than be sorry. Remind your teen that if she feels threatened, she should call 911 immediately.
In a teen dating violence situation, a temporary restraining order (TRO) may be called for. If you take this step, be sure to document all of the abuser’s behavior before the TRO has been taken out. If the abuser violates the TRO, document that too, and call law enforcement immediately. The more evidence you have – notes, text messages, voicemail messages, emails – the easier it will be to prosecute if the case calls for it.
Also, do not underestimate the importance of supporting your teen emotionally after the break up. Chances are your teens abuser was an enormous part of her life while they dated. He or she may have even been your teen’s first boyfriend or girlfriend. The breakup may also affect your teen’s school and social life and her group of friends. Support your teen if she misses this person, but remind her why they broke up. As a parent, you may not be the best person for your teen to talk to about this situation, so consider again enlisting a counselor, teacher or psychologist.
While abusers often share similar characteristics, every teen dating violence relationship is different. Use common sense when intervening, and be sure to ask for the help of experts if there is any question in your mind about how to extricate your child from a bad situation safely.
Also, if you feel that your teen or someone you know is suffering from teen dating violence, feel free to past this post on to them, along with these resources:
LoveIsRespect.org
Alabama Coalition Against Domestic Violence (ACADV)
SafeYouth.Org – Dating Violence
Labels: domestic violence, teen dating violence, teenagers
One in three teens has experienced dating violence. This is a staggering number, especially considering that it is often during those formative years that young people learn the habits and relationship roles that they carry with them later in life. For example, according to the U.S. Bureau of Justice, women ages 16 to 24 suffer the most from dating or domestic violence, with about 20 in 1,000 women being abused by their partners. Teen girls bear the brunt of teen dating violence – most teen dating violence victims are female, and these young women are at greater risk for serious injury than teen boys.
Teen dating violence is a serious problem that can affect a young person’s current life, her education and her future, and even lead to injury or death. For that reason, it is very important for parents to recognize the signs of teen dating violence and keep lines of communication open with their children when it comes to relationships and dating. Share with your children the warning signs that a relationship may turn abusive.
These signs include:
1.) Extreme jealousy and/or controlling behavior – Teens, unfamiliar with healthy relationships, may feel that jealousy or controlling behavior is “romantic” or a sign that their partner “truly loves them.” Further, young men (and even some young women) may feel that they “possess” their partners and jealousy and controlling behavior are signs of love. Controlling behavior can include dictating a partners dress and mannerisms, habits, and social life.
2.) Quick involvement – Watch for relationships that seem to crop up out of nowhere. Abusers often pinpoint victims who will allow for quick, intense involvement to the exclusion of other friends, parents, and a healthy social life.
3.) One partner has unpredictable mood swings – Explain to your child that a partner who suddenly reverts from normal to angry or sad is displaying abnormal behavior. Young women often feel that it is their responsibility to solve problems within the relationship, and may hold themselves to blame for their partner’s moods.
4.) Alcohol or drug abuse – Substance abuse is often the sign of a larger behavioral problem. Teens may be trying to medicate themselves with drugs or alcohol, or substance abuse may lead to abusive behavior.
5.) Explosive anger – Inability to control temper can lead to violence and other abusive behavior.
6.) Isolates partner from friends and family – Abusers often attempt to isolate their partners from friends and family who can offer them help or assurances that the abuser’s behavior is inappropriate.
7.) Uses force during an argument – A partner who uses bullying, physical intimidation or other forceful tactics during an argument may escalate to using physical violence.
8.) Believes in rigid sex roles – Young man who potentially abuse may believe that masculinity means aggressiveness, and femininity means submissiveness. They may also feel that they will lose “face” or “respect” if they show attentiveness or caring to their partners. They may also feel that they have the right, as a man, to demand sex.
9.) Blames others for problems or feelings – An inability to accept responsibility for failings and shortcomings can be a sign of the inability to deal with a relationship in a mature manner.
10.) Threatens violence – Some abusers may come out and broadcast their intentions. Warn your teens that if a partner threatens violence, even in a joking manner, that they should report the threat immediately.
The teenager years are a time of mystery and discovery – for teens, because they are experiencing many lifetime milestones for the first time, and for parents because teens begin to pull away and demand privacy. Keep lines of communication open with your teen so that she can make decisions that will keep her healthy and safe.
Teen dating violence is a serious problem that can affect a young person’s current life, her education and her future, and even lead to injury or death. For that reason, it is very important for parents to recognize the signs of teen dating violence and keep lines of communication open with their children when it comes to relationships and dating. Share with your children the warning signs that a relationship may turn abusive.
These signs include:
1.) Extreme jealousy and/or controlling behavior – Teens, unfamiliar with healthy relationships, may feel that jealousy or controlling behavior is “romantic” or a sign that their partner “truly loves them.” Further, young men (and even some young women) may feel that they “possess” their partners and jealousy and controlling behavior are signs of love. Controlling behavior can include dictating a partners dress and mannerisms, habits, and social life.
2.) Quick involvement – Watch for relationships that seem to crop up out of nowhere. Abusers often pinpoint victims who will allow for quick, intense involvement to the exclusion of other friends, parents, and a healthy social life.
3.) One partner has unpredictable mood swings – Explain to your child that a partner who suddenly reverts from normal to angry or sad is displaying abnormal behavior. Young women often feel that it is their responsibility to solve problems within the relationship, and may hold themselves to blame for their partner’s moods.
4.) Alcohol or drug abuse – Substance abuse is often the sign of a larger behavioral problem. Teens may be trying to medicate themselves with drugs or alcohol, or substance abuse may lead to abusive behavior.
5.) Explosive anger – Inability to control temper can lead to violence and other abusive behavior.
6.) Isolates partner from friends and family – Abusers often attempt to isolate their partners from friends and family who can offer them help or assurances that the abuser’s behavior is inappropriate.
7.) Uses force during an argument – A partner who uses bullying, physical intimidation or other forceful tactics during an argument may escalate to using physical violence.
8.) Believes in rigid sex roles – Young man who potentially abuse may believe that masculinity means aggressiveness, and femininity means submissiveness. They may also feel that they will lose “face” or “respect” if they show attentiveness or caring to their partners. They may also feel that they have the right, as a man, to demand sex.
9.) Blames others for problems or feelings – An inability to accept responsibility for failings and shortcomings can be a sign of the inability to deal with a relationship in a mature manner.
10.) Threatens violence – Some abusers may come out and broadcast their intentions. Warn your teens that if a partner threatens violence, even in a joking manner, that they should report the threat immediately.
The teenager years are a time of mystery and discovery – for teens, because they are experiencing many lifetime milestones for the first time, and for parents because teens begin to pull away and demand privacy. Keep lines of communication open with your teen so that she can make decisions that will keep her healthy and safe.
Labels: domestic violence, teen dating violence, teenagers
This week at the MLN Law blog we are talking about potentially dangerous situations for your tween and teen children. On Monday and Tuesday we talked about the ramifications of “sexting” (sending or forwarding sexually explicit messages or images) and how parents can prevent this dangerous behavior by talking to their teens.
Today we are looking at a behavior that dates back quite a bit further than the relatively new “sexting” trend, and that behavior is teen dating violence. And a new initiative started by several Atlanta teens is just in time, because October is domestic violence awareness month.
Elizabeth Cardenas, 17, was inspired to begin the nonprofit Start Strong Atlanta after watching a friend’s boyfriend verbally and physically abuse her for two years.
“She didn’t know how to get out and I didn’t know how to help her,” Cardenas told the Atlanta Journal Constitution.
Until now. The launch of Start Strong Atlanta is part of a national initiative funded by the Robert Wood Johnson Foundation, an effort to make even the need for Domestic Violence Awareness month a thing of the distant past. Sadly, the effort is being aimed at a sector that nobody likes to think about having to put up with dating violence – 11 to 14 year old girls.
The launch coincides with Domestic Violence Awareness Month and is part of a national initiative funded by the Robert Wood Johnson Foundation.
The Jane Fonda Center is another locally based domestic violence awareness group, is also getting in on the act with the Robert Woods Johnson Foundation.
“What’s… alarming is dating violence occurs at an even younger age,” Fonda, founder of the Georgia Campaign for Adolescent Pregnancy Prevention, told the Atlanta Journal Constitution.
According to Marie Mitchell, the Start Strong Atlanta program’s director, one in six high school students in the state of Georgia report having been hit, slapped or physically hurt by a boyfriend or girlfriend during the past year.
“That’s higher than the national rate, which is one in 10,” said Mitchell as quoted in the AJC.
Start Strong Atlanta, will target an estimated 2,000 seventh graders in Atlanta public schools, Mitchell said. More teenagers will be reached through the program’s community partners, which include Grady Health System and Children’s Healthcare of Atlanta.
“We hope to reach over 10,000 youths over the next four years,” said Mitchell.
As for Cardena’s friend, a parent finally intervened and the abusive boyfriend has since moved away. Tomorrow I’ll post some strategies for recognizing and dealing with teen dating violence. Meanwhile, if you have experienced teen dating violence either yourself or as the parent of a teen, I would love to hear your opinion on this serious topic in the comments.
Today we are looking at a behavior that dates back quite a bit further than the relatively new “sexting” trend, and that behavior is teen dating violence. And a new initiative started by several Atlanta teens is just in time, because October is domestic violence awareness month.
Elizabeth Cardenas, 17, was inspired to begin the nonprofit Start Strong Atlanta after watching a friend’s boyfriend verbally and physically abuse her for two years.
“She didn’t know how to get out and I didn’t know how to help her,” Cardenas told the Atlanta Journal Constitution.
Until now. The launch of Start Strong Atlanta is part of a national initiative funded by the Robert Wood Johnson Foundation, an effort to make even the need for Domestic Violence Awareness month a thing of the distant past. Sadly, the effort is being aimed at a sector that nobody likes to think about having to put up with dating violence – 11 to 14 year old girls.
The launch coincides with Domestic Violence Awareness Month and is part of a national initiative funded by the Robert Wood Johnson Foundation.
The Jane Fonda Center is another locally based domestic violence awareness group, is also getting in on the act with the Robert Woods Johnson Foundation.
“What’s… alarming is dating violence occurs at an even younger age,” Fonda, founder of the Georgia Campaign for Adolescent Pregnancy Prevention, told the Atlanta Journal Constitution.
According to Marie Mitchell, the Start Strong Atlanta program’s director, one in six high school students in the state of Georgia report having been hit, slapped or physically hurt by a boyfriend or girlfriend during the past year.
“That’s higher than the national rate, which is one in 10,” said Mitchell as quoted in the AJC.
Start Strong Atlanta, will target an estimated 2,000 seventh graders in Atlanta public schools, Mitchell said. More teenagers will be reached through the program’s community partners, which include Grady Health System and Children’s Healthcare of Atlanta.
“We hope to reach over 10,000 youths over the next four years,” said Mitchell.
As for Cardena’s friend, a parent finally intervened and the abusive boyfriend has since moved away. Tomorrow I’ll post some strategies for recognizing and dealing with teen dating violence. Meanwhile, if you have experienced teen dating violence either yourself or as the parent of a teen, I would love to hear your opinion on this serious topic in the comments.
Labels: domestic violence, Georgia, teen dating violence, teenagers
In 2009, it is estimated that 1 in 5 teens and tweens will send a sexually explicit text message via a mobile phone. This phenomenon is called “sexting” (an amalgam of “sex” and “texting”) and, as studies and the talk show circuit have recently pointed out, it is becoming a pandemic among young people.
Why sexting? Why now? First of all, the “sexting” generation grew up in a world where the internet had always been around, where instant gratification is a way of life, and where the dangers of sending sexually explicit messages and images have been sanitized by the distance. After all, how can typing on a small electronic device hurt me, teens and tweens might ask.
But a cell phone is such a personal item. As a parent, you may wonder how, besides trusting your child’s sense of propriety and responsibility, you can recognize the signs of sexting and prevent this destructive and potentially extremely dangerous behavior.
First, you can watch for the signs:
1.) Texting while alone or in the dark – Parents are generally able to spot guilty behavior. If you see your child attempting to text while alone or staying up after everyone else is in bed to text, you may have a problem.
2.) Texting for long periods of time – Some teens text like crazy, but if you notice your child spending an inordinate amount of time with the phone, check up on the situation.
3.) Changes in behavior – For some teens and tweens, sexting could be their first encounter with explicitly sexual imagery or behavior. In that case, they may show signs of discomfort or changes in normal behavior.
Even if you haven’t noticed any warning signs, keep lines of communication open to nip sexting in the bud. Possible conversation starters include:
1.) “Have you ever received a sexual picture or message on your cell phone?”
2.) “Do you think its okay to send sexy messages on your phone? Why?”
3.) “Has anybody ever pressured you to send a sexy message or picture on your phone?”
4.) “What consequences could occur if you were to send or forward a sexually explicit message or picture on your phone?”
5.) “How likely is it that cell phone messages intended for one person will remain private? How likely is it that they will be seen by other, unintended, recipients?”
The fact is that many teens and tweens do not understand the consequences of sending sexually explicit messages or images. They may not understand that electronic images are forever, or that the people they trust with their messages and images may not be equally trustworthy. They also may not understand the social and personal consequences of sexting. Teens found engaging in indecent behavior can lose scholarships, sports team membership, and face humiliation. Sexually explicit pictures can also follow them throughout their lives. A teen who fully understands these consequences will be less likely to engage in risky sexting behavior.
When talking to your teens and tweens about sexting, bring up the following consequences:
1.) Sending sexual images, even forwards, can get you in trouble with the law – Some teens have been prosecuted and forced to register as lifelong sex offenders due to sexting incidents.
2.) Anybody could see a sexually explicit picture or message, deliberately or by mistake – Mention parents, teachers, friends at school, and enemies. Teens and tweens will think twice about sending a picture that might fall into the wrong hands
3.) Sexting can hurt others – Forwarding sexually explicit materials can hurt others, causing them humiliation or other negative social consequences. Explain that many sexually explicit pictures result from exploitation and encourage your child to report any sexually explicit images or messages they receive
Have you ever found out about a sexting incident involving your teen or tween? How did you respond? Do you have any tips for parents who want to prevent sexting or believe that sexting might already be going on? I’d appreciate hearing from you in the comments.
Why sexting? Why now? First of all, the “sexting” generation grew up in a world where the internet had always been around, where instant gratification is a way of life, and where the dangers of sending sexually explicit messages and images have been sanitized by the distance. After all, how can typing on a small electronic device hurt me, teens and tweens might ask.
But a cell phone is such a personal item. As a parent, you may wonder how, besides trusting your child’s sense of propriety and responsibility, you can recognize the signs of sexting and prevent this destructive and potentially extremely dangerous behavior.
First, you can watch for the signs:
1.) Texting while alone or in the dark – Parents are generally able to spot guilty behavior. If you see your child attempting to text while alone or staying up after everyone else is in bed to text, you may have a problem.
2.) Texting for long periods of time – Some teens text like crazy, but if you notice your child spending an inordinate amount of time with the phone, check up on the situation.
3.) Changes in behavior – For some teens and tweens, sexting could be their first encounter with explicitly sexual imagery or behavior. In that case, they may show signs of discomfort or changes in normal behavior.
Even if you haven’t noticed any warning signs, keep lines of communication open to nip sexting in the bud. Possible conversation starters include:
1.) “Have you ever received a sexual picture or message on your cell phone?”
2.) “Do you think its okay to send sexy messages on your phone? Why?”
3.) “Has anybody ever pressured you to send a sexy message or picture on your phone?”
4.) “What consequences could occur if you were to send or forward a sexually explicit message or picture on your phone?”
5.) “How likely is it that cell phone messages intended for one person will remain private? How likely is it that they will be seen by other, unintended, recipients?”
The fact is that many teens and tweens do not understand the consequences of sending sexually explicit messages or images. They may not understand that electronic images are forever, or that the people they trust with their messages and images may not be equally trustworthy. They also may not understand the social and personal consequences of sexting. Teens found engaging in indecent behavior can lose scholarships, sports team membership, and face humiliation. Sexually explicit pictures can also follow them throughout their lives. A teen who fully understands these consequences will be less likely to engage in risky sexting behavior.
When talking to your teens and tweens about sexting, bring up the following consequences:
1.) Sending sexual images, even forwards, can get you in trouble with the law – Some teens have been prosecuted and forced to register as lifelong sex offenders due to sexting incidents.
2.) Anybody could see a sexually explicit picture or message, deliberately or by mistake – Mention parents, teachers, friends at school, and enemies. Teens and tweens will think twice about sending a picture that might fall into the wrong hands
3.) Sexting can hurt others – Forwarding sexually explicit materials can hurt others, causing them humiliation or other negative social consequences. Explain that many sexually explicit pictures result from exploitation and encourage your child to report any sexually explicit images or messages they receive
Have you ever found out about a sexting incident involving your teen or tween? How did you respond? Do you have any tips for parents who want to prevent sexting or believe that sexting might already be going on? I’d appreciate hearing from you in the comments.
Labels: child sexual exploitation, teenagers, teens and technology, text messaging
For every new technology, there are the (usually young) early embracers and then the (usually older) grumps who decry it as the downfall of humanity. Throughout recent history, people who we will now call curmudgeons have decried such modern inventions as the bicycle, the car, the airplane, the computer, and the microwave. One of today’s victims is the text message. And I have to confess that I’m one of those curmudgeons most of the time, and for good reason. Not only is texting and driving causing fatal accidents among our teens and college students, another use of the text message is endangering our young children’s welfare – and that use is nicknamed “sexting.”
The word “sexting” is an amalgam of the words “sex” and “texting,” and it consists of just what you might expect – sending explicitly sexual messages and even photos via text message. While “sexting” has made the talk show rounds as a phenomenon common among teens and college students, it is unfortunately true – as a recent Gwinnett County criminal case indicates – that sexting has also been used among of-age sexual predators to swap messages with their teen victims. No matter who the sender and the recipient, children have been known to abuse the power and relative ease of text messaging by sending obscene or inappropriately sexual messages, or even using a cell phone’s built in camera to send obscene pictures. Some teens, even minors under 18, have even been prosecuted on child pornography charges due to images they sent and received through sexually explicit text messages.
The Gwinnett County case took place in Lilburn, where Thomas Hartridge Bacot, 32, was recently arrested on charges of sexual exploitation of a child and electronic transmission of obscene material to a minor. The minor in this case? A 14-year-old girl.
Bacot’s attorney asked for and received a 30-day continuance to gather more information from an internet service provider, but Gwinnett County District Attorney John Warr told the Atlanta Journal Constitution that he expects the plea hearing to take place sometime during the week of October 19th and that he had expected the defendant to plead guilty to the charges.
The teenage years are a difficult time for a parent. Children want their freedom and privacy while parents are often still unsure whether that freedom and privacy has been earned. In a recent post on teens and internet use here on the MLN Law Blog, we posted about children and technology expert Jim Fisher. He had this to say on the subject of parents, teens and personal responsibility: “let the leash out slowly” and feed kids “bite-sized chunks of responsibility as they mature.”
The same should apply to texting. Instead of handing children a cell phone as soon as they are old enough to push the buttons, make them earn the privilege of private communication by showing responsibility first. And even then, be sure to monitor your child’s calls and text messages. This may mean allowing your child access to the phone for only one hour per day at first, or disabling texting altogether.
Tomorrow, I will offer more tips on how to prevent your child from sexting and advice on what to do should you find that sexting has occurred.
The word “sexting” is an amalgam of the words “sex” and “texting,” and it consists of just what you might expect – sending explicitly sexual messages and even photos via text message. While “sexting” has made the talk show rounds as a phenomenon common among teens and college students, it is unfortunately true – as a recent Gwinnett County criminal case indicates – that sexting has also been used among of-age sexual predators to swap messages with their teen victims. No matter who the sender and the recipient, children have been known to abuse the power and relative ease of text messaging by sending obscene or inappropriately sexual messages, or even using a cell phone’s built in camera to send obscene pictures. Some teens, even minors under 18, have even been prosecuted on child pornography charges due to images they sent and received through sexually explicit text messages.
The Gwinnett County case took place in Lilburn, where Thomas Hartridge Bacot, 32, was recently arrested on charges of sexual exploitation of a child and electronic transmission of obscene material to a minor. The minor in this case? A 14-year-old girl.
Bacot’s attorney asked for and received a 30-day continuance to gather more information from an internet service provider, but Gwinnett County District Attorney John Warr told the Atlanta Journal Constitution that he expects the plea hearing to take place sometime during the week of October 19th and that he had expected the defendant to plead guilty to the charges.
The teenage years are a difficult time for a parent. Children want their freedom and privacy while parents are often still unsure whether that freedom and privacy has been earned. In a recent post on teens and internet use here on the MLN Law Blog, we posted about children and technology expert Jim Fisher. He had this to say on the subject of parents, teens and personal responsibility: “let the leash out slowly” and feed kids “bite-sized chunks of responsibility as they mature.”
The same should apply to texting. Instead of handing children a cell phone as soon as they are old enough to push the buttons, make them earn the privilege of private communication by showing responsibility first. And even then, be sure to monitor your child’s calls and text messages. This may mean allowing your child access to the phone for only one hour per day at first, or disabling texting altogether.
Tomorrow, I will offer more tips on how to prevent your child from sexting and advice on what to do should you find that sexting has occurred.
Labels: child sexual exploitation, sexting, teenagers, teens and technology, text messaging
Auto accidents are the leading cause of teenage death in the United States. Car wrecks kill more than 5,000 teenagers each year. In 2007, more than 7,000 people were killed in wrecks involving teenage drivers. In the same year, more than 250,000 teenage drivers were injured.
Teenage drivers are typically inexperienced, easily distracted, and more careless than adult drivers. What can parents do to reduce the risk that their teenage driver will have an accident? The October issue of the journal Pediatrics includes two articles that suggest advice for parents of teen drivers.
In the article “Primary Access to Vehicles Increases Risky Teen Driving Behaviors and Crashes: National Perspective,” the authors found that 25 percent of teens who had primary access to vehicles had been involved in crashes. Only 10 percent of teenagers with shared vehicle access had been involved in accidents. The researchers also found that, when compared to drivers with shared access, drivers with primary access are more likely to use cell phones while driving and drive over the speed limit.
Why is that? Perhaps teens with primary access to a vehicle tend to think, “This is my car, so I can do what I want” (even if their parents bought the car for them). On the other hand, when teenagers have to ask for the car keys, they’re more likely to be careful behind the wheel, and parents are in a better position to monitor driving habits and behaviors.
A friend of mine waited until a year after her daughter got her driver’s license before she helped her daughter buy a used car. The daughter has never had a wreck or gotten a ticket. If you have a teenager, consider waiting a year or two before buying them a car of their own. They probably won’t be happy with the decision, but it just might save their life (or the life of someone else).
In the other Pediatrics article titled “Associations Between Parenting Styles and Teen Driving, Safety-Related Behaviors and Attitudes,” researchers examined how different parenting styles affect teenage driving. In the study, 50 percent of the parents were authoritative, 23 percent were permissive, 8 percent were authoritarian, and 19 percent were uninvolved. Authoritative parents were defined by high support and high control; permissive parents had high support and low control; authoritarian parents had low support and high control; and uninvolved parents exhibited low support and low control.
Can you guess which parents had the safest teenage drivers? Authoritative parents who offered both support and control had the safest teen drivers. Compared to teens with uninvolved parents, those with authoritative parents had half the crash risk, and they were 71 percent less likely to drive while intoxicated. They were also less likely to use a cell phone while driving. Teens with authoritative or authoritarian parents used seat belts twice as often and reported speeding half as often as teen drivers with uninvolved parents. In this study, there was no significant difference between permissive and uninvolved parents.
The study suggests that parents of teenage drivers should lay down the rules while offering emotional support. Make sure that your teenager is well aware of the risks of driving. Treat your teen like an adult. Work with your teenage driver to develop a written list of driving rules. When your teen breaks a rule, enforce the rules by temporarily restricting driving privileges.
If you need the legal advice of an experienced Georgia auto accident attorney, call MLN Law at 404-531-9700 to schedule your free consultation.
Teenage drivers are typically inexperienced, easily distracted, and more careless than adult drivers. What can parents do to reduce the risk that their teenage driver will have an accident? The October issue of the journal Pediatrics includes two articles that suggest advice for parents of teen drivers.
In the article “Primary Access to Vehicles Increases Risky Teen Driving Behaviors and Crashes: National Perspective,” the authors found that 25 percent of teens who had primary access to vehicles had been involved in crashes. Only 10 percent of teenagers with shared vehicle access had been involved in accidents. The researchers also found that, when compared to drivers with shared access, drivers with primary access are more likely to use cell phones while driving and drive over the speed limit.
Why is that? Perhaps teens with primary access to a vehicle tend to think, “This is my car, so I can do what I want” (even if their parents bought the car for them). On the other hand, when teenagers have to ask for the car keys, they’re more likely to be careful behind the wheel, and parents are in a better position to monitor driving habits and behaviors.
A friend of mine waited until a year after her daughter got her driver’s license before she helped her daughter buy a used car. The daughter has never had a wreck or gotten a ticket. If you have a teenager, consider waiting a year or two before buying them a car of their own. They probably won’t be happy with the decision, but it just might save their life (or the life of someone else).
In the other Pediatrics article titled “Associations Between Parenting Styles and Teen Driving, Safety-Related Behaviors and Attitudes,” researchers examined how different parenting styles affect teenage driving. In the study, 50 percent of the parents were authoritative, 23 percent were permissive, 8 percent were authoritarian, and 19 percent were uninvolved. Authoritative parents were defined by high support and high control; permissive parents had high support and low control; authoritarian parents had low support and high control; and uninvolved parents exhibited low support and low control.
Can you guess which parents had the safest teenage drivers? Authoritative parents who offered both support and control had the safest teen drivers. Compared to teens with uninvolved parents, those with authoritative parents had half the crash risk, and they were 71 percent less likely to drive while intoxicated. They were also less likely to use a cell phone while driving. Teens with authoritative or authoritarian parents used seat belts twice as often and reported speeding half as often as teen drivers with uninvolved parents. In this study, there was no significant difference between permissive and uninvolved parents.
The study suggests that parents of teenage drivers should lay down the rules while offering emotional support. Make sure that your teenager is well aware of the risks of driving. Treat your teen like an adult. Work with your teenage driver to develop a written list of driving rules. When your teen breaks a rule, enforce the rules by temporarily restricting driving privileges.
If you need the legal advice of an experienced Georgia auto accident attorney, call MLN Law at 404-531-9700 to schedule your free consultation.
Labels: auto accident, avoid wrecks, car crashes, teen drivers, teenagers
Here in Atlanta, where we have the 4th worst traffic in the nation, we see a lot of crazy driving. People change lanes without looking, cut dangerously close to other cars, fail to obey traffic signs, and text behind the wheel.
Think about the last time you had a close call in the car. How did you react? Chances are, as an experienced driver, your instincts took over. If someone tried to change lanes without seeing you, you honked the horn or, because you were aware of road conditions, carefully maneuvered your car out of harm’s way. Now imagine you are 16 and newly licensed. Even small incidents like a car starting to swerve into a their lane can cause big trouble for an inexperienced teen driver. Why?
Because of over correcting.
Master Police Officer James Poer III has stated that over correcting a vehicle is one of the most common mistakes he has seen among teen drivers. To bring the point home, just last week, a wreck on Tara Boulevard in Clayton County, Georgia left a teenage boy in critical condition all because he over corrected.
Over correction occurs when a teen driver faces a situation on the road to which he is unaccustomed. Because he isn’t an experienced driver, his natural instinct is to turn the wheel quickly to avoid an accident. Unfortunately, when a car or truck is over corrected, momentum makes the vehicle continue to go forward while the sudden change of direction makes the rear of the vehicle veer in another direction. When the inexperienced driver perceives that he has turned the wheel too far and fast, he immediately turns it back in the other direction, causing a total loss of control. Many times, as happened in the Clayton County accident, the car will go into a roll. In that case, the car rolled and ended up in the opposite lane of traffic where the critically ill teenager was found by rescue workers hanging from a passenger window.
The only way to stop your teens from falling into the over correction trap is to make sure they have enough driving experience to deal with difficult situations. Poer recommends taking your child to a large empty parking lot and instructing them to gently swerve their vehicle back and forth. This will teach teens to control a vehicle without making the potentially deadly mistake of over correcting.
As if the example of the tragedy in Clayton County weren’t enough, this YouTube video, taken from the dash cam of a Michigan police officer, shows the potential danger of over correcting. (Before viewing, note that the driver came away with only minor injuries. The driver and the officer you see in the video both credit the use of a seatbelt with saving her life.)
Think about the last time you had a close call in the car. How did you react? Chances are, as an experienced driver, your instincts took over. If someone tried to change lanes without seeing you, you honked the horn or, because you were aware of road conditions, carefully maneuvered your car out of harm’s way. Now imagine you are 16 and newly licensed. Even small incidents like a car starting to swerve into a their lane can cause big trouble for an inexperienced teen driver. Why?
Because of over correcting.
Master Police Officer James Poer III has stated that over correcting a vehicle is one of the most common mistakes he has seen among teen drivers. To bring the point home, just last week, a wreck on Tara Boulevard in Clayton County, Georgia left a teenage boy in critical condition all because he over corrected.
Over correction occurs when a teen driver faces a situation on the road to which he is unaccustomed. Because he isn’t an experienced driver, his natural instinct is to turn the wheel quickly to avoid an accident. Unfortunately, when a car or truck is over corrected, momentum makes the vehicle continue to go forward while the sudden change of direction makes the rear of the vehicle veer in another direction. When the inexperienced driver perceives that he has turned the wheel too far and fast, he immediately turns it back in the other direction, causing a total loss of control. Many times, as happened in the Clayton County accident, the car will go into a roll. In that case, the car rolled and ended up in the opposite lane of traffic where the critically ill teenager was found by rescue workers hanging from a passenger window.
The only way to stop your teens from falling into the over correction trap is to make sure they have enough driving experience to deal with difficult situations. Poer recommends taking your child to a large empty parking lot and instructing them to gently swerve their vehicle back and forth. This will teach teens to control a vehicle without making the potentially deadly mistake of over correcting.
As if the example of the tragedy in Clayton County weren’t enough, this YouTube video, taken from the dash cam of a Michigan police officer, shows the potential danger of over correcting. (Before viewing, note that the driver came away with only minor injuries. The driver and the officer you see in the video both credit the use of a seatbelt with saving her life.)
Labels: auto accident, car accidents, teen drivers, teenagers
You may have seen a story in the Atlanta Journal Constitution over the weekend about a new movement that’s gaining ground. The movement would require that all young drivers sport a sign on their cars that reads: “Caution – Newly Licensed.”
Susie Kessler, of Kennesaw, got the idea for the magnets when her son, Donne, began learning to drive in Atlanta’s hectic traffic. Kessler’s other children had learned to drive on less crowded Ohio roads and Kessler, rightfully, worried about her child’s safety. That was when she and some friends decided to start the Caution and Courtesy Driver Alliance. The campaign, which began in 2007, has distributed about 15,000 magnets, which cost less than $10, so far.
These magnets are a step in the right direction. According to the National Highway Traffic Safety Administration, auto accidents are the leading cause of death for teenagers aged 16-20. That averages out to about 5,000 children per year. That’s almost 14 per day. If that wasn’t bad enough, 300,000 additional teens are injured every year. And Kessler was right to be concerned about her son Donne’s safety on the road. Twice as many teenage boys as teenage girls die in auto accidents.
The magnet, 4 by 8 inches, is highly visible and can be seen here. According to Kessler and a bevy of satisfied parents on her website, the magnets caution other drivers to avoid tailgating or other aggressive behavior that may be just too much for a new driver to handle.
The “Caution – Newly Licensed” magnets also caught the attention of state Senator Chip Rogers (R-Woodstock), who told the AJC he’s considering writing a bill requiring all new teen drivers to brandish the stickers on their cars. The law would possibly cover all first year drivers as well as those with learner’s permits. It sounds like a good idea, but historically teen driving laws have not fared well in the Georgia legislature. Last year a bill to ban teen drivers from using cell phones while driving failed to pass.
Visit the Caution and Courtesy Driver Alliance site to order a magnet for your teen’s car. Be sure to visit the NewlyLicensed.org comments page for feedback from satisfied parents, teens and drivers.
As for the teens themselves, Kessler’s son, at least, thinks that the magnet is doing its job.
“In driver’s education we learned about the ‘space cushion’ that should be between cars,” he told the AJC. “When you have the magnet on, you automatically have that.”
There’s probably no better testament to the efficacy of the magnets than that.
How about you? Are you contemplating buying a “Caution – Newly Licensed” magnet for your teenager? Or do you already have one? Have you seen them around town and “backed off”? We’d love to hear your story in the comments.
Susie Kessler, of Kennesaw, got the idea for the magnets when her son, Donne, began learning to drive in Atlanta’s hectic traffic. Kessler’s other children had learned to drive on less crowded Ohio roads and Kessler, rightfully, worried about her child’s safety. That was when she and some friends decided to start the Caution and Courtesy Driver Alliance. The campaign, which began in 2007, has distributed about 15,000 magnets, which cost less than $10, so far.
These magnets are a step in the right direction. According to the National Highway Traffic Safety Administration, auto accidents are the leading cause of death for teenagers aged 16-20. That averages out to about 5,000 children per year. That’s almost 14 per day. If that wasn’t bad enough, 300,000 additional teens are injured every year. And Kessler was right to be concerned about her son Donne’s safety on the road. Twice as many teenage boys as teenage girls die in auto accidents.
The magnet, 4 by 8 inches, is highly visible and can be seen here. According to Kessler and a bevy of satisfied parents on her website, the magnets caution other drivers to avoid tailgating or other aggressive behavior that may be just too much for a new driver to handle.
The “Caution – Newly Licensed” magnets also caught the attention of state Senator Chip Rogers (R-Woodstock), who told the AJC he’s considering writing a bill requiring all new teen drivers to brandish the stickers on their cars. The law would possibly cover all first year drivers as well as those with learner’s permits. It sounds like a good idea, but historically teen driving laws have not fared well in the Georgia legislature. Last year a bill to ban teen drivers from using cell phones while driving failed to pass.
Visit the Caution and Courtesy Driver Alliance site to order a magnet for your teen’s car. Be sure to visit the NewlyLicensed.org comments page for feedback from satisfied parents, teens and drivers.
As for the teens themselves, Kessler’s son, at least, thinks that the magnet is doing its job.
“In driver’s education we learned about the ‘space cushion’ that should be between cars,” he told the AJC. “When you have the magnet on, you automatically have that.”
There’s probably no better testament to the efficacy of the magnets than that.
How about you? Are you contemplating buying a “Caution – Newly Licensed” magnet for your teenager? Or do you already have one? Have you seen them around town and “backed off”? We’d love to hear your story in the comments.
Labels: auto accident, teen drivers, teenagers
A tragedy occurred close to home last month when a 17-year-old boy was killed on the train tracks outside Statham, GA on Saturday, May 30. Joshua Gene Whitten was walking along the railroad tracks when a train, which was travelling the same way, struck and killed him. According to officials, the train operator braked as soon as he saw the boy, but Whitten did not move from the tracks. Officials say the operator is not at fault.
So if the train operator is not at fault, why would a 17-year-old boy fail to move off of railroad tracks when a train is bearing down?
Headphones.
According to officials, a MP3 player with headphones was found at the scene of the accident, leading them to believe that the boy failed to hear the train because of the music blaring through his earbuds. The problem of teens becoming distracted by electronic devices such as iPods, cell phones and digital video games is not a new one, but it is one that is getting more attention now that almost all teenagers own portable electronics of some kind.
Atlanta Northside Family & Parenting Examiner, Jackie Kass, pointed out that the train tragedy in Statham came just a month after a new study conducted on teens at the University of Colorado at Boulder and the Children’s Hospital in Boston, reported that teenagers tend to engage in risky behavior when it comes to their digital players. For example, when teens were asked by parents to turn their digital music players down, they tended to hike the volume up instead. Interestingly, teens showed the same behavior even when asked by peers to turn the volume down.
Boys like Whitten were also found to be more likely to pump up the volume on their digital music players. Teenage boys have long been known for their love of loud music, but portable digital players pose a danger in that they lead to hearing loss more readily and that, as in the tragedy in Statham, they lead to dangerous situations where teens are unaware of their surroundings.
So why do teens continue to rock their earbuds when the results are potentially dangerous? It turns out that teenagers may be hardwired for risky behavior. According to a Temple University study, teens may know that their behaviors – loud music, driving while texting, drinking, smoking, and even drugs – are dangerous, yet they do it anyway simply because certain parts of their brain have not matured enough yet to make them realize the risk they may be taking.
The author of the study, Laurence Steinberg, PhD, said the findings of his study should not be read as if it is useless to continue educating teenagers on the dangers they may face, but he did suggest that giving them more structure instead of appealing to their still developing reason may be the best bet for ushering children thorough the teenage years.
Do you have a teenager who engages in risky behavior? Do you agree with Steinberg that structure is key or do you have another take on the situation? Leave your answer in the comments.
So if the train operator is not at fault, why would a 17-year-old boy fail to move off of railroad tracks when a train is bearing down?
Headphones.
According to officials, a MP3 player with headphones was found at the scene of the accident, leading them to believe that the boy failed to hear the train because of the music blaring through his earbuds. The problem of teens becoming distracted by electronic devices such as iPods, cell phones and digital video games is not a new one, but it is one that is getting more attention now that almost all teenagers own portable electronics of some kind.
Atlanta Northside Family & Parenting Examiner, Jackie Kass, pointed out that the train tragedy in Statham came just a month after a new study conducted on teens at the University of Colorado at Boulder and the Children’s Hospital in Boston, reported that teenagers tend to engage in risky behavior when it comes to their digital players. For example, when teens were asked by parents to turn their digital music players down, they tended to hike the volume up instead. Interestingly, teens showed the same behavior even when asked by peers to turn the volume down.
Boys like Whitten were also found to be more likely to pump up the volume on their digital music players. Teenage boys have long been known for their love of loud music, but portable digital players pose a danger in that they lead to hearing loss more readily and that, as in the tragedy in Statham, they lead to dangerous situations where teens are unaware of their surroundings.
So why do teens continue to rock their earbuds when the results are potentially dangerous? It turns out that teenagers may be hardwired for risky behavior. According to a Temple University study, teens may know that their behaviors – loud music, driving while texting, drinking, smoking, and even drugs – are dangerous, yet they do it anyway simply because certain parts of their brain have not matured enough yet to make them realize the risk they may be taking.
The author of the study, Laurence Steinberg, PhD, said the findings of his study should not be read as if it is useless to continue educating teenagers on the dangers they may face, but he did suggest that giving them more structure instead of appealing to their still developing reason may be the best bet for ushering children thorough the teenage years.
Do you have a teenager who engages in risky behavior? Do you agree with Steinberg that structure is key or do you have another take on the situation? Leave your answer in the comments.
Labels: teenagers, teens and technology, train wreck
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